TGL # 17. Disease is a result of your condemnation of yourself

Our body works on energy. During the fight between the opposite parts of the personality, some of this energy is lost. That shortage of energy leads to diseases. Every organ of our body is functional, i.e. it performs a certain function. Our accusation of a certain function leads to development of a disease in a particular organ.

Are you ready to have your attention enter the diseased part of your body? Are you ready to meet what you fight? Are you ready to relate to your internal enemy with love? If yes, the old situation will open itself up. It will allow you to see it in a different light, and in the process the energy that was stuck there will be released.

The secret of healing is simple. You need to allow yourself to experience what you did not allow yourself to experience, considering it to be unacceptable and horrible. You have to understand that everything you have ever experienced was a necessary experience. In such a way, you can come to peace with yourself and start to re-experience all the aspects of the experience you have had, integrating it into a whole.

Disease is a result of your condemnation of yourself

— We don’t do anything that does not depend on us. And as you consider that many things do not depend on you, you are not going to do much. It’s foolish to do something that does not depend on you.

We create our life ourselves. Until you fully accept this point of view you will not be able to change anything in your life. I know that I create my own life. If I know that I create everything in my life, I will be able to change things that do not satisfy me. If there is something that I cannot control over there, then I cannot change it, and, therefore, I cannot change my life. That’s a very important thing to understand.

— One simply does not have enough power for everything, and it is reflected on one’s health.  

— It is not about power. It is about perception. That is essential. If you perceive your life as a life that even for one percent is controlled by someone else, you will not be able to change anything in it. As the majority of people consider that they do not create their life totally, they can’t change it.

I assert that every human being creates his own life the way it is himself.  If you don’t like something, you have to ask yourself and only yourself: “Why did I create this?” This is the most important topic that we all need to understand. This has to do with everything, including health. There is nothing here that is related to you that you did not create yourself. If you are not healthy right now, you are the one who created this particular disease yourself.

— What if it is a hereditary disease? How did I create it?  

— You don’t know who you are. You calmly discuss everything under the sun now, not having the answer to the most important question: who are you?

— But this is a diagnosis that was given to me by my doctor.  

— Who is given a diagnosis? Diagnosis is given to a patient. Medicine is not a business of health. The business of medicine is disease. When you come to a doctor, a doctor will find a disease in you. A doctor has to find a disease as otherwise he is not a good doctor, and he will not have anyone to treat. Today’s doctor does not heal. He treats diseases.

Everything depends on how you call it, including yourself. If you experienced a fleeting pain somewhere in your body, you run to a doctor, hear out the diagnosis, and here you go—you are the one with a disease. I don’t go to doctors. I don’t get sick. I transform.

— I also want to transform.

— If you want to transform, you have to do it yourself. If you are sick, it is your choice to be sick. I evaluate facts. The fact is you go to a doctor, swallow pills, and think that you have a disease. Who created this fact in your life? You did it yourself.

— You are talking about a choice, but a human being does not choose here—certain circumstances just add up.   

— Are we discussing disease now?

— I am talking about health.  

— And what is health?

— Health is a state of good general wellbeing. It is not a disease, and no one can make me sick.  

— You were just saying that nothing depends on you. Now you assert that no one can make you sick.

— Not everything depends on me, and I have not chosen to have a disease. I choose health and healthy life style, but there is this constant war that goes on inside me.   

— Because health and sickness walk hand in hand. The war is an accepted way of life in this particular reality. Health and sickness also fight in this reality. You, in particular, are fighting for health.

This is the reality of fighters. Therefore, we have wars and terrorism. Everyone here is fighting himself. One side of duality is fighting its opposite side. Until you agree with the dual nature of your personality, you will not be able to understand what I am talking about.

— I was healthy before. I was an athlete, and then I turned into a disabled invalid. It is scary to be torn away from the world. It is scary when people start to pity you. How can one transfer oneself from a state where, for example, a certain organ was removed, to a state where you are not perturbed whether you are healthy or not, when you deal with physical pain?   

— This is very difficult. When I am identified with the duality «health—disease» and start to activate a disease, I turn into an invalid, become afraid of it, and make all the efforts to become, so to speak, healthy. When I flip to another side and become healthy, I have a fear of becoming an invalid. You need to accept both sides in yourself as two sides of one coin.

Let me review a specific example. One day I woke up fatigued and hurting all over. I observed that being identified with my body state, I was doing everything I could to transform it to a state of health. But fear of a disease remained, and this fear created the disease in its chronic state. That is what was happening in my case.

I was in a state in which I felt myself to be a very old man who could barely move, even though there were no obvious indications of a disease. I felt totally empty inside. This reality appeared to be boring. I had a feeling people did not understand anything at all. These thoughts were coming to me all the time. My body did not obey me. It wanted to lie down or to sit down all the time. It wanted to rest. This state was not acute. It was chronic. I was constantly reminded of the disease.

I could not understand what it was as I was not fully exploring this duality: «health—disease». I was quite frequently sick as a child and that caused me to have a strong impulse to be healthy. I started to go to the gym and I continue to do it today. Daily exercises in a gym are very important for me. By doing them daily, I transform the state of a disease into the state of health. I don’t do them to achieve results. I do these exercises to be in a state of health. And this impulse is so strong, that I go to the gym on a daily basis. I run, and I swim. If I don’t do it, I get into a very uncomfortable state, i.e. the state of a disease.

— That is exactly what happens to me. 

— That is the mechanism we are discussing now and it cannot be any different. I can see that your minds cannot comprehend it. We can discuss it again and again, but the conditioned mind does not want to understand it. It understands it on its own—in separation.

— You are right, I cannot grasp it.

— You cannot get it because your mind is totally identified with this duality. If the mind, seeing a duality, starts to think, it means it is outside itself. But in order for this to happen, one has to have a strong passion to become aware. I am giving you the tools that are necessary for the work of awareness. Will you use these tools or not is for you to decide.

Right now I am discussing the duality: «health—disease». But how can you understand it? You can only understand it if you correctly understand how the laws of duality work. In order to understand these laws correctly, you need to live through and experience all this knowledge. You have to understand it through your own personality.

Our process is not only intellectual. This is a process that unites the mind, the body, and the Soul—a triunal process. The information about how things are to happen here come from the Soul. What happens to you is determined by your mind. You experience it through your physical body. But a human being got torn away from the Soul, factually from God, and got stuck in the duality of the personality and the conditioned mind. It is precisely the dual personality that creates the disease.

A human body is a perfect apparatus. Notwithstanding the horrific management, it lives on average about seventy years. In reality, our body is built to last for many hundred years. The diseases are created because the personality accentuates on one side of a duality, while being afraid and fighting the opposite to it part. Any disease is a result of a constant inner war or resistance of one part of your personal duality to its opposite part.

Naturally, everything is being reflected on the body, all the diseases of the organs are connected to this war. This is a view of a nontraditional medicine which does not view a human body only from the standpoint of physiology. We study the work of the conditioned mind here. But the conditioned mind cannot see its own duality.

I became aware of this duality when I saw that my experiencing myself as an old, tired man is the opposite side of the state of excitement I conduct my seminars with. This vision was the first step that led to further development of this theme. Now I can see it in full with all the attributes of aging, diseases, and fear of trauma. In order to become aware of a particular personal duality, one has to experience a broad diapason of states connected to it, and to become fully aware of those states.


Take a look at your motivation to be healthy which sprouts out of fear of being sick. Try to see the fight that occurs between these two parts of you. Look at your disease as the best method to «solve» a certain problem—the method that you have chosen. See the specific gain that the state of disease brings you. What are you freeing yourself of by having a particular disease? What do you get rid of by having this disease? Conflict in which particular duality has caused this disease?


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